The Family

Two of the podcasts I listened to this week both invited the same guest onto their programs to talk about The Family: A Proclamation to the World. The name of this guest was Jenet Erickson. She is a professor of family life and religion at BYU and she had some profound insights on the proclamation and the research data that supports the principles outlined in that document.

The insights I found most enlightening were those regarding parenthood. In paragraph four of the proclamation it states: "The first commandment that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God's commandment to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force." I have to admit that I haven't always championed parenthood the way that I probably should. Parenting is hard, never-ending work that rarely gets any recognition and frankly, I'd feel like a hypocrite if I were to tell my kids "this is the best job ever" when I rarely feel that way.

But some of the things Sister Erickson said really changed my perspective on the purpose of parenting and the benefits that come from being a parent. First, she told of an analysis done by a renowned Harvard sociologist named Carle Zimmerman. He studied the rise and fall of great civilizations and what he concluded was that "the defining feature of civilizations at their peak of creativity and progress was their orientation to children, specifically the bearing and nurturing of children within families." (We need children as much as they need us) She goes on to talk about how as a culture, when we are oriented towards the development of children it forces us (as parents/adults) to become more forward thinking and pushes us to the peak of our creativity and development because we're bringing out our best on behalf of our children. Growth and development happens to us when we care about the development of those around us. And whenever we care about the development of others, we in turn, become a different kind of person.

The second thing I learned from listening to Sister Erickson was that raising children really exposes our weaknesses, which opens the door for inviting in more growth. She expressed this sentiment through a quote given by Michael Novak, a Catholic scholar, when he said: "The raising of children...brings each of us breathtaking vistas of our inadequacy... My bonds to them hold me back from many sorts of opportunities. And yet they are, I know, my liberation. They force me to be a different sort of human being in a way in which I want and need to be forced."  And Elder Robert D. Hales put it another way. Speaking to an audience of women (but it can just as easily by applied to men) during an education week address in 2008 he said "Motherhood is the ideal opportunity for lifelong learning. A mother’s learning grows as she nurtures the child in his or her development years. They are both learning and maturing together at a remarkable pace. It’s exponential, not linear. Just think of the learning process of a mother throughout the lifetime of her children. Each child brings an added dimension to her learning because their needs are so varied and far-reaching." (The Journey of Lifelong Learning)

I was also reminded that parenting is another avenue in which we become more like Jesus Christ. Having a child can be a very atonement-like experience where we suffer when they suffer and we sacrifice our wants and desires for them and in that process we learn to become more selfless. These are Christlike attributes that we can learn from parenting which can help us become more like our Savior.